Sgt Frog Abridged - Episode 14 (script)
The following is unedited from the original document except for formatting. Lines may have been rewritten during recording and/or editing. Script *Pans up to Koyuki’s house* Koyuki: *Cheerful* Dororo! I’m back from school- *Deadpan* oh my god, I just got home. Dororo: *Sobbing singing, blood trickling down wall from forehead* Let’s hear for the boy, let’s hear it for MY MAAAAN! Koyuki: *Tender* Hey now, what happened… Dororo: *Sobbing* Keroro made me play strip solitaire by myself. Koyuki: You lost? Dororo: By forfeit. My conscience hung itself. Koyuki: *Flabbergasted* …How?! Dororo: AGHYEEEEGH~! Koyuki: *Friendly again* If it makes you feel better, my life doesn’t suck. My childhood was pretty cooool. And I was adopted! Dororo: Don’t bring that up… Koyuki: You’re adopted?! Dororo: …Am I…?! Koyuki: *Dreamlike* Here. Let me tell you a story about my friend Mukuro. *Cut to Child Koyuki and Mukuro giggling while spinning around; Mukuro is deadpan and robotic. Cuts back* Koyuki: The eeeend! Dororo: …Can I be in your next story? Koyuki: I know! You remember when we first met? You where there? Therefore I don’t have to tell you the whole story again? Dororo: Who’s Mukuro…? Koyuki: *Breathes, irritated sigh* *Flashback to Koyuki lying in flowers* Mukuro: Koyuki, get up. You’re making gravity sad. Koyuki: *Half-asleep* Mmm, gravity can go fuck itself- *sits up* Oh, Mukuro! *Cheerful* I was just making you a present! Mukuro: Huh…? …Wow. Took you an hour to do this, huh? Koyuki: A day, more like! What do you think? Mukuro: *Deep inhale* It’s cute. It makes my blood flow. Let’s go jump. *Large jump* Mukuro: That was fun. Zeroyasha: BARK! Koyuki: *Pumped* So what do you wanna do now? Mukuro: I can’t decide. But I have an idea. *Cut, Breeze* Mukuro: This is my thinking tree. I come here to think. I'm thinking right now. Koyuki: What’re ya thinkin’ about? Mukuro: …Band aids. Koyuki: *Sigh* Mukuro: I have a wacky idea. *Cuts to waterfall* Mukuro: *Relatively dramatic* Beyond this waterfall, Koyuki, lies the outside world. Our clan is forbidden from passing this point. But they put rocks here. … They were asking for it. *Jumps* *Gets shocked by charm* Mukuro: *Flat yell* AAAAAAAAAAAAH. Koyuki: Mukuro!!! *Clan leader suddenly appears* Clan Leader: *Dramatic* Don’t. She knew the rules. They are not to be broken- Koyuki: *Yelling irritated* Fucking old people! *Jumps down, saves Mukuro* *Mukuro lying down* Koyuki: Mukuro. Get up. Gravity is making water go down, and that’s- not- good-… I- think…? Mukuro: Agh! Koyuki? Koyuki: *Cute* Hiiii! Mukuro: What happened? Koyuki: You fell! And I caught you! Like tears on a hobo! Mukuro: *Smiles* My arteries are clapping. Thanks Koyuki. *Cuts to Zeroro in bear trap* Zeroro: Stooory ooooof my LIIIIIIFE!!! *Koyuki suddenly appears* Koyuki: *Cheery* Hi! What are you up to? Zeroro: My mom told me singing a song makes everything all better! Koyuki: *Still cheery* Did she also tell you to break your leg? Zeroro: …That was my dad… *Koyuki bandages his leg* Zeroro: I can’t thank you enough, Ms. Koyuki. I mean, I still have a hole in my leg, but… Koyuki: Don’t mention it! But my friend Mukuro says I should spray it so it doesn’t get infected. Zeroro: Certainly, but…those are my eyes- *ksssh* AAAAAAAAGH!!! Mukuro: What are you doing to those pants? Koyuki: *Gasp* Mukuro! Meet my new friend, Zeroro! *Zeroro’s eyes are bloodshot* Zeroro: Oh, you girls look cute in red! Koyuki: *Softer* He says he’s lost his direction in life, and I think he can find a new one by joining our clan. Zeroro: I’m an assassin, if that helps. Mukuro: You know what I think? Koyuki: What? *Cuts back to tree* Koyuki: *Sigh* Mukuro: Sure. *Dramatic music, them standing in a field* Dororo: From this day forward, I am Zeroro no more. Dororo shall stand and take his place… hidden in the shadows… *Cuts to clan meeting* Clan leader: Thanks to your little friend’s hide-and-seek game, half of our clan is dead. Koyuki and Dororo: Marco! Mukuro: Shut up. Clan leader: It is with great regret that I must disband our noble people. Brothers, sisters, the outside world awaits you. Thanks for NOTHING! *Ninjas disappear* Dororo: Oh, he didn’t need to thank me. Mukuro: Well Koyuki, I guess this is goodbye. Think you can handle a life in the real world? Koyuki: Nope! But I’m expecting to just pull it off ‘cause I’m stupidly lucky. Mukuro: …Do you even know what you just said? Koyuki: …Gravity? Mukuro: *Loud sigh, fades away* Koyuki: *Narration as she is seen crying* That was the last time I saw Mukuro and my clan. And I still miss them to this day… *Fades to night at the shack* Dororo: Koyuki, wake up. Koyuki: *Sleepy* Hmm…? Dororo: You fell asleep halfway through. I want to know how it ends. Do I make it? Koyuki: *Sleepy* No I made the bear trap… *Snaps out of it* Oh Dororo, listen. *Serious* I know your friends give you a hard time, but I know at least one of them has to actually care about you. Dororo: Only one. Koyuki: Exactly! I mean, I know you’re back with your friends again, but you always come home so sad. I just think, even with what they put you through, try to hold on to them. The people who matter to you aren’t going to be there forever. Dororo: Koyuki, have you ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome? Koyuki: No, why? Tamama: Dororo! Keroro: Dorodo! Tamama: Hiiiii! Keroro: Heeey, I wasn’t gonna apologize, but Giroro made me. So, uh, hegh-hegh, Dororo. Or Dorodo- I remembered your name, oh my god. Dororo: Because I think I’m cured. Keroro: Put ‘er there! Up high! …In your eye socket, okay! *Credits* *Post-Credits 1* Koyuki: Can I hug your arm, Natsumi? Natsumi: Since you’re actually ASKING, now. Koyuki: Ohhhh youuu. You still smell like muffins! Mukuro: These are my thinking glasses. I don’t wear them to think. Yeah, got you there. *Post-Credits 2- black screen, counter fades in* Dororo: I know what you’re going to say, but I’ve given this a lot of thought…and…I don’t know why I didn’t see it before. I’ve always been alone or out of place. I’ve never felt like I’ve belonged before, but I do now. I don’t need this job to be happy, I don’t need my family’s care to be happy, I don’t need Keroro’s approval to be happy. You being there for me makes me happy. And I have something very important to ask you… Can we be best friends forever? Giroro: …You can’t be serious… *Counter counts down a day, bridal chorus plays on kazoo* Category:Episode Scripts